Lately everything consists of antonyms, one thought clashing with the other. The words that escape my mouth today are the opposite of what I breathe out tomorrow. My life right now is so different from several years ago, or 1 year ago, even last month, in fact, just 3 minutes ago I wasn’t where I am this instant. One more emotion, one more feeling I can’t express in the words of this language I don’t understand, of this life that swallows me and spits me out. I’m one step further as I take a step back. Another tear shed and a stranger met. Another smile and a day I won’t forget. Maybe everything I just said is ambiguous. Honestly, this is the way it always has been, one giant tornado, collecting thoughts along the way, and dropping them all somewhere in an unknown world, some diminish while others grow. Most of them I don’t know what to do with. I find myself in this place that has no name and I wonder if I’m the only one here. Then you come inside my head once more, you whiz past me in the dark at night, you’re the shadow that follows me around everywhere, and when it isn’t sunny outside I can still feel you. Nothings ever going to change but everything always does. Another dream to add on top of this ever-growing mess.

Maybe you can make sense of it, maybe you can’t. Maybe I’m not even asking you to, but I’m not the one to ask. I’m stuck in an ever growing repetitive mess that constantly transforms itself. I can’t keep up but I might just be ready to. I feel the heat rising, and my heart pounding, I laugh out loud and dance around and forget what I’m doing.